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There are these two radio dudes, Cort & Fatboy, who seem to have a bizarre, undefinable knack
of regularly extracting gold from Katee Sackhoff in their interviews with her. Anyone who doesn't grow a soft spot for this woman after listening to the Cort & Fatboy interviews would have no apparent sense of humor and a cruel, cruel heart.
As for Cort and Fatboy, only Katee Sackhoff, TeamsSpank Team Leader herself, stands above this pair in the TeamSpank pecking order,
such is the esteem in which they are held by all TeamSpankers for extracting so much gold from Katee in their interviews with her.
Spankers can't thank you enough, fellas. Many TeamSpankers actually want to be your love slaves - even the straight males and the transgenders.
Here are the interview mp3s. We also recommend a toilet break and light refreshments, because
some of these suckers are long. BTW, it might be an idea to start at the bottom and work your way up chronologically - the first one, "Potty Mouth", is at the bottom. [If you go here, you'll also find a very cool Q&A that Katee did with Cort & Fatboy
at a screening of the 2nd last BSG epi ever].
** At the bottom of the page we've added a video interview series by
Schmoes Know
- just be cause it's a TeamSpank favourite and we've decided that they are
serious competitors to Cort & Fatboy for the title of "Best Katee Sackhoff Interviewers".
The Agent
Highlights of this - the 8th Cort & Fatboy interview - include Katee totally ripping her agent a new one, mentioning Boyfriend Scott about 10 times,
making jokes about her run-in with cancer (thyroid cancer - don't panic, apparently she's fine), and admitting she's not above using emotional blackmail to get on
a plane. I don't think I'm ever going to be able to rest easy until I find out if she got a refund on all those extra plane tickets.
[This interview is something of a redemption for Cort & Fatboy, after that last shameful effort where they somehow managed to diss Katee with their very first question. Here, let me paraphrase that one for you. "Hi Katee, nice to have you back on the show. So, word on the street is that you've been a bitch". See the "shame" interview].
Shame,Shame, Shame
In this shameful addition to the Katee Sackhoff 'Gold' Collection, Cort & Fatboy commit the cardinal sin of throwing off their unsuspecting interviewee with the very first question.
They ask Katee a question about being 'pissy' in her interviews. She seems to have no fucking clue what they are crapping on about and is consequently thrown completely off her game for the next 25 minutes.
Well, the next 25 seconds anyway. The entire Spank Collective feels her pain. Cort & Fatboy are lucky that Katee didn't hang up there and then and run away to cry.
Katee's disgraced interviewers then proceed to deflect the 'pissy' blame onto other interviewers and then her VERY OWN FANS. Carnage ensues. (Dudes, there are fans and there are fans - don't lump us in with the rest of those psychotic freaks - Spankers are psychotic freaks with a sense of humour). Days later, Fatboy reveals the true source of the
seemingly bogus claims. It appears that some of the more fanatical Battlestar Galactica fans schmucks are outraged that Katee has not been expressing any apparent desire to either hack at
her own wrists with a razor blade or hurl herself under a train because Battlestar is winding down. Katee is looking optimistically to the future and they just don't like it.
To this TeamSpankers collectively sigh "fuckaduck, what's a girl to do?"
Oh also, TeamSpank gets a mention in this shameful interview but we couldn't tell if that was a good thing or if Katee was just being sarcastic, as per usual.
Salmon Burgers
In this interview, Cort & Fats rub it in about how Katee was the star of Bionic Woman - in practice if not on paper - while Katee feigns embarrassment and meekly eats a salmon burger. She does not talk with her mouth full.
Also interesting to note that at one point Cort(?) reveals that they are now off the air and so it's ok to swear. It takes Katee, oh, maybe 8 to 10 seconds to start letting them rip.
(Katee Sackhoff is really going to hate this website. We're so sorry - we love you Katee. You're just so fun - we can't help it).
Road Rage
Just when you think Katee's trail-blazing legend could have plateaued, along comes this vintage Sackhoff gold to get the momentum going again.
If you listened to another 1000 interviews with any other celebrity, the chances are that you would never again hear a live-to-air road rage outburst. Magical.
More Lies
Katee lies poorly all the way through her 'post-Starbuck death' interview, but then she was contractually obliged to be deceiving so that's ok.
She has said that her school teacher considered her to be an excellent compulsive liar, but having listened to many of her interviews,
TeamSpankers have actually come to understand that Katee is in fact compulsively honest and that her lies are transparent.
This just makes her an even better actor though - as she is so able to convincingly bullshit in character.
Juggling
...and so it goes, a legend was born. Without a doubt the most famous of all Katee Sackhoff interviews. This was recorded live in the studio with Cort and Fatboy and her brother - but Katee seemed to think she was at the pub.
It is this interview that endeared Katee to the hearts of Spankers spanning the globe. It is priceless stuff. However, her parents are probably still coming to terms with it.
Never Bullshit a Bullshitter
In this interview, Katee claims to have not returned Cort and Fatboy's emails because she leaves her laptop all over the place. She is obviously lying. That's OK Katee - the only good emails are deleted ones, hey?
Spankers be warned - in this interview Katee says a couple of words that you may not understand ("Dirty Sanchez"). Under no circumstances should you research these words or your will be scarred for life. Miss Sackhoff, you have blood on your hands.
Potty Mouth
In their first interview with Katee, the boys establish that she is a pretty bad potty mouth and would even swear in front of her grandmother. Katee also shoots the shit with a stoner who likes Korn.
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Sackhoff Gold
